A reasonably good day

While evaluations and other forms of feedback invariably raise my anxiety level to dangerous levels I still had a good day----mostly. Once I got the dangerous thoughts out of my head, at least they stopped dominating my thoughts.

Truth is, I should be doing something else. But at 56 with large bills and no savings I'm likely stuck. Plus with the lingering depression, even though I'm much better, I feel like damaged goods.

Still today wasn't bad.

Changing my mind.

Some time back I considered "coming out of the closet" by using my name instead of a pseudonym. Nothing came of it because depression came roaring back (can depression roar). I wasn't good for much for several months. Now with the depression largely controlled I've decided I need to maintain plausible deniability (assuming actual anonymity is impossible). Events have lead me to realize I have more MAJOR issues. While a blog is a poor substitue for a close friend or even a counselor it is a way to get my thoughts "on paper" and out in the open.

So for the forseeable future, I'm still the WanderingCleric.